.:one day glory:.

2005-04-17T21:15:00.000-07:00

my feet

2004-10-10T20:17:00.001-07:00

shirts, anyone??

2004-07-07T22:14:00.000-07:00

These are the poems I turned in for my final portfolio. Some of the changes I don't like...my professor kinda "made me" make them, but some of them I think made them a lot better. Enjoy.

Three Hour Delay

I remember seeing your stained face
Being washed by your harsh tears.
I cannot recall your features—
The color of your eyes, the shape
Of your nose and mouth,
But I am certain I would know you
If I happened into that train station again
And saw you sitting on a corner.

I think your name was Tanya,
And you are probably thirty by now.
Maybe older and surely wiser.
Your hair was tangled—
A light auburn.

Do you still wear that silver crucifix around your neck—
The one that ignited our conversation?

I saw meekness in someone
For the first time that day—
It looked stunning on you.
Take it off from around your shoulders
And wear it on your waist.
Allow it to wrap around you—
Make it echo my farewell embrace.

Tanya, you were London’s redemption
On the day that was meant to be
For me and the Queen’s Golden Jubilee.

-------------------

Foundation of Change

Sitting in solitude,
her face is broken,
reflecting pieces of her shattered heart.
Her shadow is stretched
thin across the bitter room,
and her dark hair falls into her fading eyes.
The surroundings are obscured,
And force retreat into her hollow self.

Weary eyes closed,
she lets herself become absorbed.
Inside there is nothing,
her damaged will is the only thing she can grasp.
It in turn holds her in bondage
and silences any concept of Reality.
The past invites a pain
that transcends the quiet and the night,
and compels her to voice an empty prayer
full of tears and resentment.

Unstable words fall to the ground
like a December rain.
She requests reasons
as to why the world is her torment,
and curses those she’s never met
for authoring her foul existence.
Her lips press together in order for the flood to cease,
and she faintly ponders the notion of Life
beyond her place of death.

------------------

one-dimensional insight

you don’t get it
the power and sensation
that go into my boundless strokes
you only see trees
streams grass and bunny rabbits
you talk about the substantial
but what’s beyond the façade?
let me paint you a picture
you can’t explain
abstract
hard to swallow
let me offer myself
leb nephesh chalowm
stay away from philosophy
from art
from really living
one day i’ll be gone
it will be gone
unfortunately
you may not miss us

-------------------

Happy Anniversary

An entire year, free from
you. Thank God. You held me back
with your chains. A few remnants
still remain, but not for long.

Your hands were always so cold.
I’m sure they still are. So was
your face. Even when you smiled
and laughed, you looked misleading.

When I knew you, you didn’t
like people. Is that still true?
“Whoever does not love does
not know God. . . .” Think about it.

Enough about you and your
imperfect nature. Let me
explain how I traded our
beguiled days for sanity.

Many weeks were filled with bad
hair days and frozen coffee.
I threw out the claddagh right
away; I knew it was broken.

I tried to defend you in
my head and in my heart and
to the rest, but that didn’t
last long. Not one believed me.

I couldn’t believe myself,
wishing for you. Hoping you
would morph for me, just so I
wouldn’t seem a naïve fool.

I had moments I wanted
to see Jesus, and leave this
hell we made. My existence
was a waste of time and space.

I finally figured out
that I was a moon, meant to
reflect brilliant light. One who
illuminates the darkness.

The problem was that for so
long, you were my world. You held
me in a constant eclipse;
I was drowning in your wake.

I heard your year ended well
and happily ever
after. Congratulation
on the picket fence, stranger.

An entire year free from
you. It feels as though it’s been
eternity, but what a
wonderful one it’s been.

--------------

six twenty-two

a sudden blaze,
awakens and overtakes.
the stars say goodbye
to my window that faces east.

Monotony is stunning.

--------------

The Rape Field

Among the amber dust
Adorning my hair with a golden kiss,
Is where I gave myself away.

For so long I offered my sacrifices,
Igniting them on my own altar of deception.

My lips tasted bitter,
Glossed with confession
And fertile reality.

There I laid down my gifts,
Releasing the thick scent of honey
Into the azure stretch above.

Surrounded by champagne shoots
And shades of emerald pasture,
I became aware of a new hue of ambiance
That extends from my toes to the sky.

------------------

Mortal Thought

I am terrified of what I might not ever become.
I want to fly away and watch from afar.

They say distance makes the heart grow fonder,
But how far must I go before I miss it?

I try to see and think like you,
But instead we cover my eyes and let the setting slip away.

My ignorance binds me,
And forces me into a world in which I have no voice.

How far must I go before I find it?
Conscience says the answers are forever.

I am terrified of what I might not ever become,
But as long as we're together, I’m everything I’m supposed to be.

2004-04-26T20:41:00.001-07:00

six twenty-two

a sudden blaze,
awakens and overtakes.
the stars say goodbye
to my window that faces east.

2004-04-26T20:41:00.000-07:00

The Rape Field

Among the amber dust
Adorning my hair with a golden kiss,
Is where I gave myself away.

For so long I offered my sacrifices,
Igniting them on my own alter of deception.

My lips tasted bitter,
Glossed with confession
And fertile reality.

Surrounded by champagne shoots
And shades of emerald pasture,
I became aware of a new hue of ambiance
That extends from my toes to the sky.

2004-03-09T15:15:00.000-08:00

petition

if you
take away
the heart
and soul
all that’s left
is an empty
vessel

2004-03-09T14:22:00.000-08:00

one-dimensional insight

you don’t get it
the power and sensation
that go into my boundless strokes
you only sees trees
streams grass and bunny rabbits
you talk about the substantial
but what’s beyond the facade?
let me paint you a picture
you can’t explain
abstract
hard to swallow
let me offer myself
leb nephesh chalowm
stay away from philosophy
from art
from really living
one day i’ll be gone
it will be gone
unfortunately
you may not miss us

2004-02-24T15:00:00.000-08:00

-Foundation of Change-

She’s there, sitting in solitude with no accompaniment.
Her face is broken, reflecting the pieces of her shattered heart,
And her shadow, like her soul, is stretched thin across the bitter room.
Her dark hair falls into her fading eyes, eyes that have never seen Truth,
And obscures her surroundings, forcing her to retreat into her hollow self.

She closes her weary eyes and lets herself be absorbed into the darkness.
Inside there is nothing for her to hold onto but her damaged will,
Which in turn holds her in bondage and silences any concept of Reality.
The past invites a pain that transcends the quiet and the night,
And compels her to voice an empty prayer full of tears and resentment.

Her words are unstable and fall to the ground like a December rain.
She requests reasons as to why the world is her torment,
And curses those she’s never met for authoring her foul existence.
Eventually her lips press together in order for the flood to cease,
And she faintly ponders the notion of Life beyond her place of death.

2004-02-09T21:41:00.000-08:00

$1 for anyone who can tell me what this poem is about.

"at the gate"

I stare through the hole that looks into the outside world.
The money's ceased to flow, bare flesh passes by.

I long to step inside the world on the other side.
It's cramped in here and lonely, nothing is real.

From my seat I see people running, screaming, crying;
Others rejoice as the refreshing water washes over them.

But it is here that I will sit and watch it all,
Until he comes and tells me it's time to leave this place.

Then I will step into the light, freedom all around.
Here is my walk that will lead me home.

2004-02-09T21:36:00.000-08:00

.:Hometown:.

The false town is grey and desolate today.
The land has been trampled by greed and lust,
All while the false people stood by and smiled,
Welcoming the change in density.

Lives were auctioned off and assets gained.
A creative dream, sold. A first kiss, sold.
Fifteen years of memories, sold,
All so the stampede of sin could begin again.

Today the lights have been turned off,
The actor has left his stage,
And the uninvited guests have left the show.
We surface to examine what little honor has remained.

But somehow, on this desolate day,
Among the shadows and the dust,
Droplets of Grace fall from the sky
And give hope to us that still call this place home.

2004-02-09T21:35:00.000-08:00

Mortal Thought

I am terrified of what I might not ever become.
I want to fly away and watch from afar.

They say distance makes the heart grow fonder,
But how far must I go before I miss it?

I try to see and think like you,
But instead we cover my eyes and let the setting slip away.

My ignorance binds me,
And forces me into a world in which I have no voice.

How far must I go before I find it?
Conscience says the answers are forever.

I am terrified of what I might not ever become,
But as long as we're together, I’m everything I’m supposed to be.

2004-02-09T21:34:00.000-08:00

Alone, lost, not sure of who to get ahold of,
I am sitting on the corner in solitude.

Tired of waiting, cold, and hungry,
I begin to pace wondering if I'll ever see them again.

Crying inside, angry and scared,
I was forgotten to be picked up from school.

Did I do something wrong,
something to make you mad?

Or did I forget where we would meet,
are you waiting somewhere else?

Help me find you amidst the emotions,
at least show me the way home.

You can see, you know where I am,
I'll be waiting right here.

2004-02-09T21:33:00.000-08:00

As you can see, I deleted my old blog. This is my new blog. I'm just going to use it for my poetry...my "blogging" is totally on my xanga now. Thanks for the memories, Blogger.